My name is Sterling, I'm 22-years-old, and I am the birthmother to the most gorgeous little boy in the world. I started this blog to share my experiences, thoughts, and help myself move forward after placing my sweet little boy. If this is your first time visiting my blog, I invite you to read my story (top of the left column). Feel free to comment with questions or requests. If you follow me, I'll follow you!

Monday, November 22, 2010

I just knew.

This is a very short post, but I feel that I need to share my feelings.

I've never been one to get hit-over-the-head confirmations from the Lord about anything. Ever.

I'm rarely one to get the warm, fuzzy feeling.

But when I made the decision to place David into Dave and Amy's arms, and I prayed to know that it was true...

I just knew. While my heart was breaking, I also felt an incredible peace settle over me. For the first time in months (possibly years), I could think clearly. I felt strong.

I knew long before I asked and prayed. Most birthmothers do. But, had I not prayed and actively sought the confirmation I so desired, I may not have been able to stick with my decision. Since that time, I have learned to rely on the Lord in all that I do. That's not to say that I DO always rely on the Lord (still working on that..), but I know that it is absolutely necessary.

Almost one year ago, I met Dave and Amy for the first time. It has been a beautiful, albeit difficult, journey. And I am so grateful for that journey.

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